The following is copied here, with permission, from a friend on Facebook whose daughter attends the same school as J. The following words are very true and inspiring.....
There is something magical about Abbeys world. Every now and then you get a glimmer of what lies within. You look into her beautiful blue eyes and are greeted with such amazing kindness and love that for those few moments nothing matters, the sun shines and the air smells sweet.
Watching her spin around, bounce on the trampoline or swing as high as she possible can makes me feel like there is nothing more important in the universe than to feel the happiness she feels. Her need to love and be loved by all people and animals is sometimes overwhelming and can make you feel almost claustrophobic. But what lies at the heart of her strangles and flying arms and legs is just one simple thing. A smile. A smile from you to let her know you see her, let her know you feel the love and kindness within her heart. A smile from her to tell you that you're the most important person to her at that very moment. Why do people have to tut or stare? It takes more effort to form a rude statement, shake their head or raise their eyebrows than it would for them to just accept pure happiness and joy, and just smile back.
She's loud and strong, she eats with her mouth open and hums most of the day. She'll push you to one side if you're not moving fast enough or you're simply in her way, she gets right in front if your face when you're trying to talk to someone. But you know what. The stress you feel when she does these things, the twitch it gives you, having to listen to 'mmmmmmm' all the way through your meal? None of it matters. You need to understand something about Abbey, about all children that are different, 'different, not less'. They will live the rest of their lives hearing the comments you make, feeling the stares across a room, seeing the distaste on your faces and it won't change them, not for a second. They will continue to be happy, they will continue to hum all day and spin and swing and bounce and tap and have little to no social awareness. You can't change someone with your opinion, your comments of 'not normal' or a little click made by your tongue.
If you want to make a difference in someone's life then think about the following things you could do; smile a little when you see them. Say hello when they speak to you, even if they speak with their hands. Wave if they wave. If they are crying give a heartfelt smile to whomever is with them, let them know they don't need to explain themselves or make excuses for their children. Open yourself up to a world that has always existed, used to be hidden but is now open to the world. Read a forum or two on disabled children and the behaviours, health problems, social issues, day to day struggles. Teach yourself to understand. Look beyond the end of your own nose and see the amazing people, young and old that are behind the tantrums and outbursts caused by frustration because they can't just tell you what they want or need.
Or if you can't manage that much and feel it doesn't effect you enough for you to bother with, just stick with the first one on the list. Smile.
It takes less than 2 seconds to change someone's life. Someone that will forever live with people's ignorance, someone who, no matter how rough the tide gets, will always manage to give you 2 seconds of their life to brighten yours.
I hope Abbey can inspire the world some day. That magical smile....it changed my life.
Copyright A.Chapman.
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